Thursday, July 23, 2009

Foal me once…

The birth of a happy, healthy baby is always good news, and if that baby belongs to a friend, it’s an occasion to break out the champagne, which I was ready to do recently for my pal, but then I heard the details. I had almost popped the cork when he off-handedly mentioned his new baby girl just happened to weigh SEVENTY-SEVEN POUNDS!
I’m not one to judge others; people come in all shapes and sizes. But a seventy-seven pound baby?

I didn’t want to be rude, and subjects don’t come any touchier than a man’s children, so I smiled politely at my friend, all the while trying to imagine what kind of monster had been hatched in his household. And what about his poor wife!

I was picturing double-reinforced strollers, triple-girded cribs and buckets of baby formula when my friend asked if I wanted to see a photograph. I tried to think of a courteous way to decline, to no avail. As he casually pulled the photo from his wallet, I braced myself for the ogre-like creature I was expecting.
What did I see? A horse! His horse had given birth. He tricked me! I’m not upset, though; it’s a beautiful, appropriately-sized horse, and he has promised me a ride once she’s trained.

Baby Abra with her friend Jenna

Tuesday, July 21, 2009

Free Willis!

Whenever I go for a ride, I make sure that I’m never left alone in our van. Like most dogs, I enjoy the occasional car trip, but I refuse to be left to roast in the back seat. With the windows up and the air off, the inside of a car becomes unbearable within a few short minutes. There is no way I would ever let someone lock me in a car alone; it’s deadly!

Imagine yourself a prisoner in your own car, while the temperature rises with each passing second. Sitting there, forlorn, only a couple empty soda cans and some fast food wrappers for companionship, you wait in vain for someone to rescue you. Doesn’t sound like much fun does it?

Many dogs die every summer locked in parked cars. Just in the last couple of weeks, seven show dogs died when their handler left them in a van overnight, despite leaving six electric fans on and a door and windows open. Cracking a window is not enough and neither is a fan or a bowl of water. It is never safe to leave your dog alone in a car! If you don’t think you can take your dog with you when you arrive at your destination and you don’t have somebody who can wait with your dog while the car is parked, then don’t take your dog. I don’t mean to berate anybody, but I cannot overstate the misery a dog endures baking in the hot sun. Take me to the park, the beach or a friend’s house, but if you’re going to your accountant’s office, the mall or anywhere else dogs aren’t allowed, unless someone can stay with me at all times, I’ll stay home, thank you.